September 6th, 2005
She’s off! Marissa is crawling. No more struggling to crawl by going two steps forward and five backwards…she’s mastered the real thing! Of course, she loves to go for the dog bed and the dogs. Just the things we wish she wouldn’t go for.
Each week we’re able to look back and see how much more she trusts us. The feeling is wonderful! We know we’ll look back in a month and see so much more, but for now, we are pleased. We see true progress daily and it is miraculous.
Marissa is also a squealer. She loves to make noises. When she’s frustrated, she squeals, then blows raspberries.
Marissa still won’t accept solid foods, so she may be our first baby who won’t eat birthday cake on her first birthday! She’s gaining weight well and growing taller, so for now she’s doing all right on the formula and cereal. She’s about 20 lbs now, so she’s gained about six pounds since she came to us, but can still wear 6 month size clothing. She’ll be one year old on September 23.
She lives up to the name we gave her while waiting for her…she’s a “Sweet Baby.”
Sunday, August 5, 2007
Third Week Home
August 28th, 2005
Life is a pathway of choices, each setting us on a different road. We’re so joyful we risked the unknown and obeyed the calling to adopt. Sometimes, while we’re caring for Marissa, we think about how she would still be in the Chinese orphanage, or worse, dead, if we hadn’t chosen this route. Some of the babies were sick enough that we aren’t sure they would have made it if it hadn’t been their time to be adopted. We are humbled by God’s power and grace.
This third week home showed true progression in Marissa’s trust in us and her comfort in our family. She has been sleeping much better, loves Spencer, thinks Shelbie is okay, recognizes her brother when he visits (and loves him), and is understanding english. She can mimic many things and enjoys playing mimic games with people, especially Daddy. She plays differently with each of us and comes to each of us for different things. Daddy says she wants Mama for comfort. Sounds like a normal kid!
The other day, Dennis was blinking his eyes at Marissa, so she started blinking her eyes back at him and smiling. She’s pretty sharp. Marissa is up on all fours now, and is starting to crawl…mostly backwards, which really frustrates her. She seems like an adult in a baby’s body. She knows what she wants, and where she wants to go, but can’t make her body do it.
When we say this child loves music, she LOVES music. She needs to hear it everyday. It makes her so happy. Just getting close to the CD player makes her start moving like she’s dancing. She remembers the tunes and makes nosies like she’s trying to sing them. Sometimes if we’re rocking in her room and Mama sings one of the songs, Marissa will sit up and look at the CD player. She knows where the songs are supposed to comes from. Either that, or she smart enough to politely look at the player to urge Mama not to sing with her croaky voice. Think we’ll end this post on that thought!
Life is a pathway of choices, each setting us on a different road. We’re so joyful we risked the unknown and obeyed the calling to adopt. Sometimes, while we’re caring for Marissa, we think about how she would still be in the Chinese orphanage, or worse, dead, if we hadn’t chosen this route. Some of the babies were sick enough that we aren’t sure they would have made it if it hadn’t been their time to be adopted. We are humbled by God’s power and grace.
This third week home showed true progression in Marissa’s trust in us and her comfort in our family. She has been sleeping much better, loves Spencer, thinks Shelbie is okay, recognizes her brother when he visits (and loves him), and is understanding english. She can mimic many things and enjoys playing mimic games with people, especially Daddy. She plays differently with each of us and comes to each of us for different things. Daddy says she wants Mama for comfort. Sounds like a normal kid!
The other day, Dennis was blinking his eyes at Marissa, so she started blinking her eyes back at him and smiling. She’s pretty sharp. Marissa is up on all fours now, and is starting to crawl…mostly backwards, which really frustrates her. She seems like an adult in a baby’s body. She knows what she wants, and where she wants to go, but can’t make her body do it.
When we say this child loves music, she LOVES music. She needs to hear it everyday. It makes her so happy. Just getting close to the CD player makes her start moving like she’s dancing. She remembers the tunes and makes nosies like she’s trying to sing them. Sometimes if we’re rocking in her room and Mama sings one of the songs, Marissa will sit up and look at the CD player. She knows where the songs are supposed to comes from. Either that, or she smart enough to politely look at the player to urge Mama not to sing with her croaky voice. Think we’ll end this post on that thought!
At Home
August 16th, 2005
Marissa has been home now for over a week. She is still not sleeping all night. Mommy has to say that God has TRULY been keeping her going. It’s been a month of no sleep now. There’s no way Mommy would still be going if God wasn’t working. We asked God to let us glorify Him through this process. He is at work.
Marissa also probably won’t sleep at night until she decides to eat real food from a spoon. Mommy doesn’t even have to worry about trying to get her used to it - Daddy loves to do it! Each night when he comes home from work, he gets a fruit and spoon out and tries to get Marissa interested. He considers it a victory that she didn’t fight him tonight…she just kept shaking her head “no.” He managed to get a few spoonfuls of peaches in. Mommy managed to get Marissa to swallow a drink of apple juice today. She’s so funny the way she gags afterwards. She’ll get used to it! Daddy is cute the way he buys Marissa treats each time he goes to the store for something. He always does the same thing for Mommy! We’ve got a pretty good guy!
Marissa is learning her name. She has had so many “firsts” that it’s hard to remember everything new she’s doing. She claps her hand against ours when we say to clap. She LOVES music SO MUCH! She listens to her baby CD’s and knows the songs when we sing them to her at other times.
At first, she was terrified of the house and dogs, but is now settled in with them. Spencer (the Golden) keeps watch on her at night and at naptime. Shelbie (the Miniature Schnauzer) gets upset when Marissa cries. She is loved.
Marissa’s personality is emerging more each day. The “quiet and gentle child” has a mind of her own and is very funny. When she laughed with Mommy today, I swear she was trying to kiss. She came at Mommy with her mouth open and deliberately moved it to Mommy’s mouth, then just lay there. It made Mommy laugh more because Marissa wouldn’t move. Oh well, we’re already sharing a cold and cough! That’s probably another reason it’s hard to sleep at night. Pray for her because she seems to have bad dreams and memories of the orphanage sometimes at night. In time, that will improve, but we believe prayer works, so let’s use it.
Marissa has been to church, met many new people, went on many neighborhood walks, got a new swing, went swinging at the school with Mommy, starting taking baths in the kitchen sink (much easier for now) and started enjoying them…and so many more “firsts.” As soon as he can, Daddy will post some of the pictures.
Marissa has been home now for over a week. She is still not sleeping all night. Mommy has to say that God has TRULY been keeping her going. It’s been a month of no sleep now. There’s no way Mommy would still be going if God wasn’t working. We asked God to let us glorify Him through this process. He is at work.
Marissa also probably won’t sleep at night until she decides to eat real food from a spoon. Mommy doesn’t even have to worry about trying to get her used to it - Daddy loves to do it! Each night when he comes home from work, he gets a fruit and spoon out and tries to get Marissa interested. He considers it a victory that she didn’t fight him tonight…she just kept shaking her head “no.” He managed to get a few spoonfuls of peaches in. Mommy managed to get Marissa to swallow a drink of apple juice today. She’s so funny the way she gags afterwards. She’ll get used to it! Daddy is cute the way he buys Marissa treats each time he goes to the store for something. He always does the same thing for Mommy! We’ve got a pretty good guy!
Marissa is learning her name. She has had so many “firsts” that it’s hard to remember everything new she’s doing. She claps her hand against ours when we say to clap. She LOVES music SO MUCH! She listens to her baby CD’s and knows the songs when we sing them to her at other times.
At first, she was terrified of the house and dogs, but is now settled in with them. Spencer (the Golden) keeps watch on her at night and at naptime. Shelbie (the Miniature Schnauzer) gets upset when Marissa cries. She is loved.
Marissa’s personality is emerging more each day. The “quiet and gentle child” has a mind of her own and is very funny. When she laughed with Mommy today, I swear she was trying to kiss. She came at Mommy with her mouth open and deliberately moved it to Mommy’s mouth, then just lay there. It made Mommy laugh more because Marissa wouldn’t move. Oh well, we’re already sharing a cold and cough! That’s probably another reason it’s hard to sleep at night. Pray for her because she seems to have bad dreams and memories of the orphanage sometimes at night. In time, that will improve, but we believe prayer works, so let’s use it.
Marissa has been to church, met many new people, went on many neighborhood walks, got a new swing, went swinging at the school with Mommy, starting taking baths in the kitchen sink (much easier for now) and started enjoying them…and so many more “firsts.” As soon as he can, Daddy will post some of the pictures.
Day 12 - 8/4/05 Final Day
August 4th, 2005
Our special journey of love is closing, but only the prologue is over. This is the beginning of a lifetime adventure. We will share tragedies and triumphs, disappointments and joy, and through it all we will grow together. That’s what life is about…how we grow each day and find ways to glorify God in all we do and are. That’s what we pray for Marissa and all the families who have opened their hearts to the special children God has chosen for them. That’s what we want for those of you who have cared enough to take this journey with us.
Today we did last minute shopping and tried to figure out how in the world we are going to get the goodies we purchased home! I think we need one of the freight ships we see on the Pearl River outside our window each day. We have many items to give to Marissa to show her the art and customs of the land she was born in, the country that God allowed to care for our daughter before He placed her with us.
Tonight we had dinner with Ed and baby Emily, and Shannon, Carmen, and baby Sophia, friends from our journey. We’ll all be ready with bags packed at 4:30 AM to prepare to leave for the airport.
We will continue to post a few more things as we get Marissa home, but for now…there’s much to do and we have a 3:00 AM wake-up call!
Our special journey of love is closing, but only the prologue is over. This is the beginning of a lifetime adventure. We will share tragedies and triumphs, disappointments and joy, and through it all we will grow together. That’s what life is about…how we grow each day and find ways to glorify God in all we do and are. That’s what we pray for Marissa and all the families who have opened their hearts to the special children God has chosen for them. That’s what we want for those of you who have cared enough to take this journey with us.
Today we did last minute shopping and tried to figure out how in the world we are going to get the goodies we purchased home! I think we need one of the freight ships we see on the Pearl River outside our window each day. We have many items to give to Marissa to show her the art and customs of the land she was born in, the country that God allowed to care for our daughter before He placed her with us.
Tonight we had dinner with Ed and baby Emily, and Shannon, Carmen, and baby Sophia, friends from our journey. We’ll all be ready with bags packed at 4:30 AM to prepare to leave for the airport.
We will continue to post a few more things as we get Marissa home, but for now…there’s much to do and we have a 3:00 AM wake-up call!
Day 11 - 8/3/05 American Consolate Oath
August 1st, 2005
This morning our group went to the U.S. Consulate for the swearing in ceremony. The adoption is officially complete on both the China and US sides!! Marissa is stuck with us!
There were two lines at the U.S. Consulate. We, of course, were in the US citizens line, and we were quickly moved inside and taken care of. The building didn’t look as I expected it to. Cameras are not allowed inside, so we do not have photos to post, but it seemed more like going into Motor Vehicles Registration than a US Consulate office.
Even though the swearing in is a quick process, it was a touching moment. The depth of what we have done struck me again and I had tears in my eyes as I said the words. Afterwards, all the parents cheered and we told our babies what had happened. Marissa is not a US citizen yet, though. She will be as soon as she touches US soil. That will happen when we make a flight connection in Detroit on August 5th. This afternoon we also received Marissa’s passport.
Some of the families are starting to leave now. It’s good to see everyone heading for home to continue their lives together, yet watching them leave is bittersweet. The time spent here is priceless. It is an atmosphere totally removed from everyday concerns where parents are able to devote themselves entirely to their new child. The time will always be remembered with great fondness and love. The families here share an incredible life-changing experience and our brief time together is special in a bonding way that is only understood by those involved. MaryBeth, you are here in our hearts and traveling this journey with us. Your job has been the hardest and your joy is about to come.
This morning our group went to the U.S. Consulate for the swearing in ceremony. The adoption is officially complete on both the China and US sides!! Marissa is stuck with us!
There were two lines at the U.S. Consulate. We, of course, were in the US citizens line, and we were quickly moved inside and taken care of. The building didn’t look as I expected it to. Cameras are not allowed inside, so we do not have photos to post, but it seemed more like going into Motor Vehicles Registration than a US Consulate office.
Even though the swearing in is a quick process, it was a touching moment. The depth of what we have done struck me again and I had tears in my eyes as I said the words. Afterwards, all the parents cheered and we told our babies what had happened. Marissa is not a US citizen yet, though. She will be as soon as she touches US soil. That will happen when we make a flight connection in Detroit on August 5th. This afternoon we also received Marissa’s passport.
Some of the families are starting to leave now. It’s good to see everyone heading for home to continue their lives together, yet watching them leave is bittersweet. The time spent here is priceless. It is an atmosphere totally removed from everyday concerns where parents are able to devote themselves entirely to their new child. The time will always be remembered with great fondness and love. The families here share an incredible life-changing experience and our brief time together is special in a bonding way that is only understood by those involved. MaryBeth, you are here in our hearts and traveling this journey with us. Your job has been the hardest and your joy is about to come.
Day 10 - 8/2/05 - American Consolate Appointment, Group Red Couch Photo, and Group Dinner
August 1st, 2005
Today we had to wait in our hotel rooms from 10:00 AM to 11:30 AM just in case the American Consulate had questions about our files. No one from our group had any problems!
Each adopted baby from China gets the traditional “red couch” photo before they go home with their forever families. Today was the special day for our travel group - the Guangdong group. We also had our group photo taken. It took quite a while to get the babies and parents and cameras situated, so even if a baby did extraordinarily well for a while, eventually in at least one picture, they are caught crying. These special children have been through so much in the last two weeks. Our travel group hasn’t been able to spend a lot of time together, since we had so many sick babies, but we have seen our babies grow and develop and begin to bond, and each precious moment is priceless.
We also had the traditional group dinner, where many chose to wear traditional Chinese clothing. Marissa loved mommy’s dress. She thought it was so pretty, she kept touching and staring at it. She also loves mommy’s hair and likes to lay close to my shoulder and stroke my hair while she looks at me. She was very good at the dinner. Right now she just takes everything in.
She can be very serious because she really wants to see all the things and study all the things she has never experienced, but when she plays she has that sweet baby laugh/giggle. She is a joy!
After dinner, we watched the CHI Powerpoint presentation of the CHI Foundation (raises money for surgeries for the orphanage children, and the presentation for all 55 familes CHI has adopting in China right now. The presentation showed all the babies coming to and being with their new families over the past two weeks. It really is a blessing to all involved to see God’s children receive so much love and attention and a permanent home.
Today we had to wait in our hotel rooms from 10:00 AM to 11:30 AM just in case the American Consulate had questions about our files. No one from our group had any problems!
Each adopted baby from China gets the traditional “red couch” photo before they go home with their forever families. Today was the special day for our travel group - the Guangdong group. We also had our group photo taken. It took quite a while to get the babies and parents and cameras situated, so even if a baby did extraordinarily well for a while, eventually in at least one picture, they are caught crying. These special children have been through so much in the last two weeks. Our travel group hasn’t been able to spend a lot of time together, since we had so many sick babies, but we have seen our babies grow and develop and begin to bond, and each precious moment is priceless.
We also had the traditional group dinner, where many chose to wear traditional Chinese clothing. Marissa loved mommy’s dress. She thought it was so pretty, she kept touching and staring at it. She also loves mommy’s hair and likes to lay close to my shoulder and stroke my hair while she looks at me. She was very good at the dinner. Right now she just takes everything in.
She can be very serious because she really wants to see all the things and study all the things she has never experienced, but when she plays she has that sweet baby laugh/giggle. She is a joy!
After dinner, we watched the CHI Powerpoint presentation of the CHI Foundation (raises money for surgeries for the orphanage children, and the presentation for all 55 familes CHI has adopting in China right now. The presentation showed all the babies coming to and being with their new families over the past two weeks. It really is a blessing to all involved to see God’s children receive so much love and attention and a permanent home.
Day 9 - 8/1/05
August 1st, 2005
Today was bright and sunny! No more rain off and on! We went shopping.
Mommy went for a foot massage at a professional parlor. The massage lasted 70 minutes, and was actually almost a total body massage. The staff also brought mommy fresh watermelon slices and hot tea. All this only cost RMB $48 - or USD $6. Marissa and daddy took a walk by the river, then came back and Marissa enjoyed watching. Daddy didn’t get one - he doesn’t like massages! Momm enjoyed the massage, but since she’s “tender” she had to keep saying to ease up!
Mommy got strawberry ice cream afterwards and daddy got a fresh baked pastry. Marissa still won’t take anything but her bottle, so she didn’t want any of mommy’s ice cream. Once she tastes it, that’ll change!
Daddy bought a new carrier for Marissa today. He didn’t like mommy’s and wanted something he could also carry Marissa in. It is similar to a Snugli brand. Marissa loves riding facing forward. She has to see what’s going on. Get this…the brand name is funny. It’s “Mr. Nipple.” Now, that’s love for daddy to wear it! Think she’s got him wrapped around her finger?
This afternoon before we left for the cruise we played in the White Swan Mattel playroom again. Marissa had fun sitting up to play. You can tell by her photos that she is developing those muscles quickly.
Tonight we went on a group dinner cruise. We met at 5:45 and rode a bus to the river to dock. It was fun. Daddy really enjoyed the dinner and ate things like octopus and duck, pork and chicken, different vegetables, rice dumplings…quite a variety of food and he really liked it all. Marissa was an angel. She didn’t fuss at all, even though she started to get tired. After dinner we went to the top deck and walked outside. Bright lights on tall buildings bordered the river, so Marissa was mesmerized by them. She really likes bright colors and those big eyes were absorbing everything! We got back to the hotel room at about 8:45…late for all the babies who needed to get back and take baths, then eat dinner. Marissa has now had her bottle, medicine, and bath and is sleeping next to daddy on the bed while he watchs TV.
Day 8 - 7/31/05 Visa Paperwork
July 30th, 2005
We have now had Marissa for a week! By this time next week, she should be in her new home, sleeping in her new bed. She’ll feel like a princess!
This morning Marissa has been playing silly games with mommy and daddy. She also napped on daddy’s chest, wrapped up in her favorite soft, pink blanket. Mommy and Marissa visited the playroom today to see what toys Marissa was interested in playing with, and they also took long walks around the hotel because Marissa was a fussy girl.
This afternoon daddy completed paperwork to get Marissa’s visa. This evening we all went to dinner with a couple we met at the airport before we went to meet our group and go to the White Swan who just adopted a 12 month old baby from a different orphanage than Marissa’s. You can see photos of some of what the local restaurant offered, but no one in our group tried them! Everyone stuck with traditional Chinese food, but daddy did try tea, which is a first. After dinner we all took a long walk and chatted. Marissa was too tired from her busy day, so she demanded an early dinner and fell asleep without her bath.
We have now had Marissa for a week! By this time next week, she should be in her new home, sleeping in her new bed. She’ll feel like a princess!
This morning Marissa has been playing silly games with mommy and daddy. She also napped on daddy’s chest, wrapped up in her favorite soft, pink blanket. Mommy and Marissa visited the playroom today to see what toys Marissa was interested in playing with, and they also took long walks around the hotel because Marissa was a fussy girl.
This afternoon daddy completed paperwork to get Marissa’s visa. This evening we all went to dinner with a couple we met at the airport before we went to meet our group and go to the White Swan who just adopted a 12 month old baby from a different orphanage than Marissa’s. You can see photos of some of what the local restaurant offered, but no one in our group tried them! Everyone stuck with traditional Chinese food, but daddy did try tea, which is a first. After dinner we all took a long walk and chatted. Marissa was too tired from her busy day, so she demanded an early dinner and fell asleep without her bath.
Day 7 - 7/30/05 Gone Shopping
July 30th, 2005
This morning the rain poured. We were supposed to go to the Guangzhou Zoo, and a few members of our travel group did go, but we stayed “home.” We took an extra long time at the breakfast buffet, then toured the hotel and took pictures of the waterfall and fish Marissa loves to watch, and other things. A fifteen year-old Chinese American (born here, but living in NY) was visiting to see where she was born, and she came over to talk to us about Marissa because she thought she was cute.
This afternoon we shopped with Ed and Emily. Many vendors asked Ed “where your wife?” They found it hard to believe that a daddy could come to China by himself and do a good job withthe baby. Well, MaryBeth “trained him well.” We told them he is doing a good job. We all had fun.
Some items we thought we’d buy we didn’t, because we couldn’t get the vendors to bargain as much as we wanted them too, and we got pretty good deals on other items. Mommy and Daddy love the Chinese embroidery and picked up a few little items, along with some hand-painted vases. We also chose fabric to have a Chinese outfit made for Marissa. She will wear it at the end of our stay in China, most likely at the group dinner.
This morning the rain poured. We were supposed to go to the Guangzhou Zoo, and a few members of our travel group did go, but we stayed “home.” We took an extra long time at the breakfast buffet, then toured the hotel and took pictures of the waterfall and fish Marissa loves to watch, and other things. A fifteen year-old Chinese American (born here, but living in NY) was visiting to see where she was born, and she came over to talk to us about Marissa because she thought she was cute.
This afternoon we shopped with Ed and Emily. Many vendors asked Ed “where your wife?” They found it hard to believe that a daddy could come to China by himself and do a good job withthe baby. Well, MaryBeth “trained him well.” We told them he is doing a good job. We all had fun.
Some items we thought we’d buy we didn’t, because we couldn’t get the vendors to bargain as much as we wanted them too, and we got pretty good deals on other items. Mommy and Daddy love the Chinese embroidery and picked up a few little items, along with some hand-painted vases. We also chose fabric to have a Chinese outfit made for Marissa. She will wear it at the end of our stay in China, most likely at the group dinner.
Day Six - 7/29/05
July 29th, 2005
One of the mothers in a group from another agency has a baby from Marissa’s orphanage who is sick like Marissa was in the hotel clinic the first night we went in with Marissa. I saw her yesterday and she told me about an American doctor at another hotel, which has a medical center in it, across town. We took Marissa this morning and are so glad we did. She has an ear infection and the doctor gave us a new antibiotic that will take care of the bronchitis and the ears. He also gave her Tylenol Cold and Cough and a liquid medication that will take the place of the breathing treatments. He said we should stop everything else (Thank God!) she is taking and that we should see a big difference within the next twenty-four hours. We’re praying that she won’t have any problems flying home since we have three different take-offs and landings. Mommy always has problems with one ear during take-offs and landings, due to allergies; I can’t imagine our poor sweet Marissa hurting from it. It was so wonderful to have an American doctor and to be in a doctor’s office that was like being in the states!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The medical exam this afternoon at the local medical clinic (mandatory exam for the U.S. Consulate) was a piece of cake. They just weigh the babies, measure the babies, make sounds to ensure they can hear, ask us if they’ve been sick, etc. It goes very quickly, because they want the babies to pass. From what we saw this afternoon, if they aren’t running a fever, they’re okay. Marissa’s fever is gone now, so she did well. We can already tell a difference in Marissa this evening. We’re so glad she went to the medical center to see the American doctor!
One of the mothers in a group from another agency has a baby from Marissa’s orphanage who is sick like Marissa was in the hotel clinic the first night we went in with Marissa. I saw her yesterday and she told me about an American doctor at another hotel, which has a medical center in it, across town. We took Marissa this morning and are so glad we did. She has an ear infection and the doctor gave us a new antibiotic that will take care of the bronchitis and the ears. He also gave her Tylenol Cold and Cough and a liquid medication that will take the place of the breathing treatments. He said we should stop everything else (Thank God!) she is taking and that we should see a big difference within the next twenty-four hours. We’re praying that she won’t have any problems flying home since we have three different take-offs and landings. Mommy always has problems with one ear during take-offs and landings, due to allergies; I can’t imagine our poor sweet Marissa hurting from it. It was so wonderful to have an American doctor and to be in a doctor’s office that was like being in the states!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The medical exam this afternoon at the local medical clinic (mandatory exam for the U.S. Consulate) was a piece of cake. They just weigh the babies, measure the babies, make sounds to ensure they can hear, ask us if they’ve been sick, etc. It goes very quickly, because they want the babies to pass. From what we saw this afternoon, if they aren’t running a fever, they’re okay. Marissa’s fever is gone now, so she did well. We can already tell a difference in Marissa this evening. We’re so glad she went to the medical center to see the American doctor!
Day Five - Lazy Day (7/28/05)
July 27th, 2005
I called today our lazy day because we stayed in the hotel all day to allow Marissa time to get well. It is Dennis’ birthday…HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Daddy, but we need to focus on Marissa healing. She has two more breathing treatments today. One was at 9:00 this morning, one is this afternoon at 3:00. Nothing seems to help her as much as those treatments. I think she might be in a tent at the hospital for a few days if we were at home.
Tomorrow we have to go to get her medical exam for the U.S. Consolate appointment in a few days. I don’t understand how they make babies go when they’re sick. We’ll see what happens. If we can get the “rumbles” in her chest under control and she isn’t running a fever, maybe she’ll pass. By the way, I keep forgetting to mention that we weighed Marissa the day after we got her and she weighed about 14 lbs. The update we received was just not true. Her feet aren’t even as big as they said! She’s wearing the 6-9 month clothes and they are loose on her.
I had to bite my tongue yesterday at the clinic. I really had to rely on God because the Chinese doctors and nurses were telling us Marissa was sick because we were not dressing her well (her arms and legs are exposed in the sundresses), not feeding her enough, are keeping our room too cold (anyone believe that Miss I Need A Sweater would have a cold hotel room?), and they thought our idea to also stand in the bathroom with the shower running so Marissa would get more breathing treatments was absurd. That’s just the beginning of their complaints. All of this after we RECEIVED her sick and every baby from her orphanage has the same illness! I had to tell myself to shut up, let God handle it since He is ultimately in control, and just enjoy my two weeks bonding with OUR baby, then get her home!
I know there’s a cultural and language difference, but when they scolded us, then began speaking to each other in Chinese, with all the rest they were doing, I just felt myself losing it! Mommy didn’t go to the next appointment, Daddy went with Marissa. Mommy was afraid she’d let the doctors have it. By this morning I was able to see them again. It’s amazing how fiercely protective we become! I really don’t want this post to sound negative, though. The situation was probably also magnified since we haven’t slept and our bodies are dealing with the time change. Truly every moment of this is precious to us.
No one will be happy, but with Marissa not feeling well, and the medicines we’ve been mixing and giving, then taking her for treatments, we haven’t taken any pictures today and it is already after noon. We’ll try to get some photos taken this afternoon. She’s lounging in pj’s and blankets today.
Marissa saw birds in one of the lobbies today and loved them! She liked the looks and the sounds. Today she initiated Daddy by throwing up on him. Daddy is totally wrapped around her finger! That fact was already evident, but when Marissa was at the keyboard with me, then Daddy came up to show me something and Marissa reached out and grabbed his thumb, he totally melted.
This morning Marissa went down for a nap because she was up not feeling well most of the night. When I put her in the crib, she started protesting because she hates going in it! She’s used to staying in it all the time and we’re now convinced that the knot on the back of her head is from bumping her head into the side of the crib when she rolls over. It just seems to have a rash or bite on the top of it. Anyway, when she protested the crib, I pulled it over right next to the bed and lay down with my hand in her crib and watched her from between the slats. She eyed me and reached out to sroke my hands, then grasped a finger. She looked my body up, then down and cooed at me before looking again. You could honestly see an expression in her eyes that said she was willing to trust me to stay with her, then she lay down to sleep. I keep watching for her to stir so that I can hurry back to lay down so she’ll see my still there.
We LOVE seeing her personality and trust come out more each day. Instead of awakening with a frightened look that said “the nightmare continues,” she awakens with a look that says “wow…they really are still here!” She’s beginning to look at us with trust and we know that each day will bring so many wonderful blessings. All the Leizhou babies are sick and very developmentally delayed. Time and patience will nourish her. We’re so blessed and joyful to have her and are awestruck that God chose us to help Him grow her into who He created her to be.
All the babies LOVE to be on the go! You can really tell that they are tired of being stuck in cribs or orphanages and they take everything in! It is incredible to see how God matched each child with their new families, too. You can truly see how they resemble each other or have the same habits or behavior characteristics. If ANYONE reading this has ever had the slightest desire to adopt…domestically or internationally, get down on your knees and pray, then listen for guidance. Only God gives us the desire to do this and you will never experience anything like it! The joy and blessings are tremendous…and we’re only beginning the journey!
Day Four - Sightseeing and more
July 27th, 2005
Last night when I woke up in the middle of the night, I knew I should have trimmed Marissa’s fingernails when I put her to bed. Oh well, we aren’t thinking well right now!
This was the first morning that Marissa awakened cranky. She woke up earlier than normal, around 5:00, and ate breakfast, but not as much as normal. We had to meet at 9:00 am with the group for sightseeing at Yuexiu Park, Chen Clan Temple, and the jade and pearl market. We got ready, then had breakfast and it was almost time to meet. We had a good time, and the posted pictures are from our trip, but it just took so long because as the morning progressed, we could tell that Marissa was acting the way she was because she was getting worse, even though yesterday she seemed to be doing better.
When we returned, we took her temperature, but it was just slightly over normal. We’re sure that she was warm from being outside so long. We made an appointment and took her to the hotel clinic. When she was examined at the hotel clinc, they said she had bronchitis and prescribed their course of treatment. It will be so nice to get an American doctor to look at her! All of the Leizhou babies are so sick. One in our group has pneumonia and had to go to the hospital last night. By the way, if you look at the picture of Marissa in the towel from Day Three, you will see her hand looks bruised. It is a mark from where the orphanage used an IV on her before we came. These babies have been sick for a while.
Dennis also broke a tooth eating breakfast this morning, so please pray that Marissa gets well quickly and easily, and that Dennis doesn’t have problems with his tooth while we are away from home!
MaryBeth, there’s a special picture posted just for you! Check out those dads! Everytime I see Ed and Emily together, they look like they are sharing a special joke. Your husband is hilarious. Dennis and I have both enjoyed him and Emily. It has been a joy to see Emily begin to blossom. The changes from the first night are tremendous.
Today we bought Marissa a beautiful pearl necklace for her wedding day. We also bought a pink pearl mother/daughter matching bracelet set.
Well, there’s still a lot to do tonight, and Marissa goes back to the clinic in an hour for another breathing treatment, so no more posts tonight.
Day 3 - Bonding Day
July 26th, 2005
Today was a “free day” for the families. We’ve all enjoyed getting acquainted, but no one really wanted to plan outings together today. We all needed a day without a schedule and time to bond with our new babies on our own pace.
Marissa felt so much better this morning. She slept 8 hours (not that mom or dad did) and her antibiotics and new cough medicine (from the clinic last night) are helping her to get well. Today she battled constipation and we finally used a baby lax to get her to go to the bathroom. She was pretty miserable until then. She was much happier after her problem was resolved, but our room had a new scent…ode to poo poo. Don’t think we’ll bottle it.
Marissa showed her bossier side today. The day went according to her plan, and we enjoyed every minute. She showed more of her personality and laughed quite a bit during one-on-one playtime. She kept reaching out to our faces and stroking them. She’s got some sharp fingernails, but won’t let me cut them yet. She doesn’t want me to hold her hand that long yet. I won’t force it, but will try again and eventually get them trimmed. In the meantime, we may have to call her “Blade.”
Her cutest picture today was at bathtime. She loves being naked and wrapped in the huge, soft towel. Marissa loves soft things and strokes her face with them. Her favorite blanket has been the soft, pink one from Glenda. She also loves a small soft fleece blanket with a bear head at the corner. She brings it with her when we go out and she rubs her face with it while sucking two fingers. She developed many ways to soothe herself at the orphanage. I feel so sad for the babies who get little stimulation and discover their own ways to comfort and entertain themselves. Marissa makes many sounds and likes to click and suck her tongue. Many of the other babies do the same things. She’s pretty funny when she plays and makes the sounds.
Today was a “free day” for the families. We’ve all enjoyed getting acquainted, but no one really wanted to plan outings together today. We all needed a day without a schedule and time to bond with our new babies on our own pace.
Marissa felt so much better this morning. She slept 8 hours (not that mom or dad did) and her antibiotics and new cough medicine (from the clinic last night) are helping her to get well. Today she battled constipation and we finally used a baby lax to get her to go to the bathroom. She was pretty miserable until then. She was much happier after her problem was resolved, but our room had a new scent…ode to poo poo. Don’t think we’ll bottle it.
Marissa showed her bossier side today. The day went according to her plan, and we enjoyed every minute. She showed more of her personality and laughed quite a bit during one-on-one playtime. She kept reaching out to our faces and stroking them. She’s got some sharp fingernails, but won’t let me cut them yet. She doesn’t want me to hold her hand that long yet. I won’t force it, but will try again and eventually get them trimmed. In the meantime, we may have to call her “Blade.”
Her cutest picture today was at bathtime. She loves being naked and wrapped in the huge, soft towel. Marissa loves soft things and strokes her face with them. Her favorite blanket has been the soft, pink one from Glenda. She also loves a small soft fleece blanket with a bear head at the corner. She brings it with her when we go out and she rubs her face with it while sucking two fingers. She developed many ways to soothe herself at the orphanage. I feel so sad for the babies who get little stimulation and discover their own ways to comfort and entertain themselves. Marissa makes many sounds and likes to click and suck her tongue. Many of the other babies do the same things. She’s pretty funny when she plays and makes the sounds.
Day Two - Monday, 7/25/05
July 25th, 2005
Adoption Day in China!! The Chinese side of Marissa’s adoption was completed this morning!! Hooray!! She’s stuck with us now! Sometimes when she studies us, it seems that might be what she is thinking!
This morning we all journeyed back to the Adoption Center to meet with the Chinese Notary and Registrar to legalize the adoption here. They asked us if we wanted to accept this child and if we would always love and protect her and never abandon or abuse her. I think you know what our answer was. Of course we will love her…we already do! She’ll always be loved and protected and well-cared for in our arms. She was born to be our daughter and the newest member of our family. We also received our first family photo that will be used as documentation for passport to leave for her new home in America. It’s cute. We’ll photograph it and post it. Marissa was sleeping and had to be awakened for the photo, but she did a great job, then promptly fell back to sleep!
Although Marissa slept through most of during our necessary outing, she was not fussy at all when we had to awaken her. We noticed she felt very warm, and as soon as we returned to the hotel we took her temperature and it was running 101.4. We had started her on the antibiotic the previous evening, so we gave her baby Tylenol. She finally accepted water while we were at the Adoption Center. She had still been refusing food. She wasn’t accepting food from strangers! Hunger finally won out and she accepted water, but nothing else (we tried formula, cereal, congee, mashed banana, mashed egg, even maple syrup to stimulate her. We tried feeding her, tried placing it beneath her nose to entice her to eat, even placed it on the fingers she keeps putting in her mouth. Nothing worked, not even the various bottles and nipples we brought. She finally accepted water from a Nuk bottle that was given to us as an extra gift at the church baby shower. I threw that bottle in the diaper bag at the last moment in case we wanted to use it for water!
After returning to the hotel, we prepared a bottle with plain formula (without the cereal the orphanage said they added) and used the water bottle she had accepted earlier. It worked! She finally ate a few ounces! She has since taken a short nap and awakened starved. She accepted formula in the “magic bottle” and a little cereal in the Playtex nurser we brought. We had to cut a larger hole in that nipple, so it was hard for her to adjust to sucking this new nipple because it flowed so much faster. Poor baby…she already has enough to adjust to! It felt so good to have her demand to eat!
We kept telling our group coordinators that we were concerned about the upper respiratory infection, but that we were using the antibiotic and the Tylenol had taken the fever away. Elsie came to check on us this afternoon and I showed her the knot on the back of Marissa’s head. When I asked the orphanage director about it on Gotcha Day, she said it was a bug bite. It sure didn’t look like one to us. Elsie said it looks like a boil and is taking us to the clinic at 8:30 tonight. Elsie said they’ll put an herbal pack on it. How I long for Dr. Sullivan (at home) right now!
Marissa had her first bath this morning. It took both of us to do it, since she can’t sit up yet. We made it fast and she tolerated it. You could tell it was something she’ll one day enjoy, though. When we were finished, she smelled so good! She wore the cutest sundress from her Grandma May today. So many people (Chinese people on the street and Americans) talked about how adorable she looked today. Her daddy sure looked proud as he carried her around!
Adoption Day in China!! The Chinese side of Marissa’s adoption was completed this morning!! Hooray!! She’s stuck with us now! Sometimes when she studies us, it seems that might be what she is thinking!
This morning we all journeyed back to the Adoption Center to meet with the Chinese Notary and Registrar to legalize the adoption here. They asked us if we wanted to accept this child and if we would always love and protect her and never abandon or abuse her. I think you know what our answer was. Of course we will love her…we already do! She’ll always be loved and protected and well-cared for in our arms. She was born to be our daughter and the newest member of our family. We also received our first family photo that will be used as documentation for passport to leave for her new home in America. It’s cute. We’ll photograph it and post it. Marissa was sleeping and had to be awakened for the photo, but she did a great job, then promptly fell back to sleep!
Although Marissa slept through most of during our necessary outing, she was not fussy at all when we had to awaken her. We noticed she felt very warm, and as soon as we returned to the hotel we took her temperature and it was running 101.4. We had started her on the antibiotic the previous evening, so we gave her baby Tylenol. She finally accepted water while we were at the Adoption Center. She had still been refusing food. She wasn’t accepting food from strangers! Hunger finally won out and she accepted water, but nothing else (we tried formula, cereal, congee, mashed banana, mashed egg, even maple syrup to stimulate her. We tried feeding her, tried placing it beneath her nose to entice her to eat, even placed it on the fingers she keeps putting in her mouth. Nothing worked, not even the various bottles and nipples we brought. She finally accepted water from a Nuk bottle that was given to us as an extra gift at the church baby shower. I threw that bottle in the diaper bag at the last moment in case we wanted to use it for water!
After returning to the hotel, we prepared a bottle with plain formula (without the cereal the orphanage said they added) and used the water bottle she had accepted earlier. It worked! She finally ate a few ounces! She has since taken a short nap and awakened starved. She accepted formula in the “magic bottle” and a little cereal in the Playtex nurser we brought. We had to cut a larger hole in that nipple, so it was hard for her to adjust to sucking this new nipple because it flowed so much faster. Poor baby…she already has enough to adjust to! It felt so good to have her demand to eat!
We kept telling our group coordinators that we were concerned about the upper respiratory infection, but that we were using the antibiotic and the Tylenol had taken the fever away. Elsie came to check on us this afternoon and I showed her the knot on the back of Marissa’s head. When I asked the orphanage director about it on Gotcha Day, she said it was a bug bite. It sure didn’t look like one to us. Elsie said it looks like a boil and is taking us to the clinic at 8:30 tonight. Elsie said they’ll put an herbal pack on it. How I long for Dr. Sullivan (at home) right now!
Marissa had her first bath this morning. It took both of us to do it, since she can’t sit up yet. We made it fast and she tolerated it. You could tell it was something she’ll one day enjoy, though. When we were finished, she smelled so good! She wore the cutest sundress from her Grandma May today. So many people (Chinese people on the street and Americans) talked about how adorable she looked today. Her daddy sure looked proud as he carried her around!
Gotcha Day
July 24th, 2005
Finally! The long-awaited day arrived! So many emotions surround one day, one moment, when three lives intertwine forever.
The day passed quickly, and started with breakfast, then about an hour of sightseeing (actually we were looking for the bank to exchange money). Next, we went to a pre-baby arrival meeting with the other families in our group. The couples who had traveled to Beijing first joined the rest of us who arrived late last night and Simon and Elsie instructed all the excited parents about what we would need to do over the next two weeks.
We were told to meet at the “red couch” at 2:30 to catch the bus to the Adoption Center. We spent the time after the meeting shopping (without buying yet - there’s too much to see) and eating lunch. Everyone was on time at 2:30 (what a surprise!) and we headed to meet our babies. When we arrived at the Adoption Center, one of the mothers caught a glimpse of the nannies carrying babies inside. The babies made the long journey by bus (they left for at least a six hour journey at 5:30 am) from the orphanage and were tired, hot, and hungry when they arrived, but were honestly still very good-natured, considering what they had endured and the stressful changes their lives were taking.
Excitement was evident as it felt like our hearts were beating so hard you could see it pumping, but it was a joyful excitement without fear or stress. It just felt natural and right. We were ready.
When they called our name and brought Marissa into the room, I felt like I (Terri) would cry, but when Marissa came to me, no tears fell because she needed reassurance and calm, not a blubbering mom! Remaining calm for Marissa in no way diminished any of the joy in receiving her, though. It all “just felt right.”
The babies all knew their lives had changed and seemed on “stimulation overload.” Marissa soaked everything sight and sound in. She studies everything with a deep concentration. She came to us without tears and actually smiled at mommy right away. Before leaving the center, daddy got a smile, too. Marissa didn’t cry until we were back at the hotel (and after a thirty minute nap on daddy’s chest). She cried and seemed to be hungry, but refuses to take the bottle because the nipple is different than the one at the orphange. I wish they’d sell those to us! No one’s baby has eaten yet tonight.
Marissa has an upper respiratory infection, and since the doctor gave us antibiotics just in case, we started giving them to her tonight. All the babies from her orphanage are sick with the same cold. She sleeps now, and has been for about an hour. She’ll probably be up all night since she won’t eat!
Marissa is very gentle and loves to be held against your chest and loves to be talked to in a soft, gentle voice or loves you to sing softly to her. Since mommy likes to make up songs, we had a winning combination tonight that came in quite handy when she refused to eat!
Referral Day!
June 16th, 2005
May 23, 2005Today we received the long-awaited referral!Lei Xiao Jia is living at the Leizhou Social Welfare Institute in the Guangdong Province of China. She was born September 23, 2004. She turned eight months old today. We have named her Marissa Melane. We are so blessed to receive such a young baby and are anxious to bring her home to be loved by her family.
May 23, 2005Today we received the long-awaited referral!Lei Xiao Jia is living at the Leizhou Social Welfare Institute in the Guangdong Province of China. She was born September 23, 2004. She turned eight months old today. We have named her Marissa Melane. We are so blessed to receive such a young baby and are anxious to bring her home to be loved by her family.
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